“ We have investigated ourselves and found no problems “
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Yeah nearly choked on my breakfast when I saw that headline.
“Hmmm…this floor seems to be made of floor…”
*insert Obama medaling Obama meme here*
No racists in the Nazi part, says the Nazi party
Just a big rod going at the v
“there may be harassment but it hasn’t been ‘widespread’ yet”
There is no war in Ba Sing Se
Ah. The favorite line of the police too. And SEA governments.
“All of our harassment is well contained.”
We found that ourselves are doing no bad things. Trust us bro.
Really? How can something on that level not trigger a 3rd party audit? How can the shareholders be OK with this answer? How is Bobby Kottick STILL CEO? How is Microsoft not threatening not to buy them unless they take some serious steps? How are Microsoft shareholders OK with this? They should be pitching a fit because it’s a toxic investment as it is. This is another fucking Nokia…
Is due diligence not a thing anymore?
This is where the snarky “gamer” journalism titles gets everyone twisted.
Activision hired [outside investigators.](https://news.bloomberglaw.com/us-law-week/activision-hires-wilmer-for-sex-harassment-probe-as-workers-howl)
Now… I don’t know anything about that company and their reputation…
“No prostitution at the strip club”, says the strip club.
If they were going to lie, they lied that not only were there no harassment they actually saved women from harassment
Is it true?
Reminds me of the USA police and gov’t
This is such an editorial twist on the headline. Of course when any business is facing a media firestorm, they are going to make a statement about themselves.
Ah yes, the Catholic Church response.
“No human rights violations have been committed at Aperture Science” commented a representative of Aperture Science, following an internal investigation performed by Aperture Science.
“There is nothing suspicious going on here” – every villain ever
FUCK activation
Internal Affairs and their zany antics
“The holocaust didn’t happen”, says Illinois Nazi.
Ahh, the FIFA explanation.
Hey the police say the same thing
Phew I was getting worried
Whew, that’s a relief. I was beginning to worry.
Guys, we checked ourselves and determined we didn’t wreck ourselves.
Well, the curch is doing it too and proved it works. At least in Germany.
They even ask the citizen to apologize to the curch for the child abuses 😀