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played a lot of neon white recently and it’s a great time but once I’m in the zone for a while I get ***real*** twitchy
Not pictured: Skipping bathing.
Wait till he finds out the less sleep, live debuffed and cope with drugs strat
Play enough racing sims and you’ll always be tempted to hit those apexes.
I’m very anti-morning so I’ve slept with my next day clothes on countless times
You can also save 5 minutes or so by not showering. Not only do you save on time there, but it also makes movement more efficient, as your thighs will be properly greased up and people will naturally get out of your way due to the awful stench! Pro strat!
If you work from home, you can skip out on the entire commute.
the issue is skipping something important then going on to waste your time talking to someone for no reason
Work: unskippable cutscene
Just put a toaster in the tub and jump in, it saves a lot of time
45 minutes aimlessly on my phone negating it all
Ngl, thought I was in r/adhd. Regardless, I still got a kick out of it
sudden death -57 years.
Ive been speedrunning sex for quite some time!
*-80 seconds*
I strive to be this efficient in life.
This dude is damage boosting his way to work.
> “Health is a resource!”
My morning routine doesn’t need to be perfectly optimized, since I’m limited to public transportation which operates on a frame rule system.
7 minutes to cook an egg? That’s below casual. That poor egg is ruined.
I’m being a dork here, but there’s a song from the musical “The Pajama Game” that describes this comic perfectly. It’s titled “Think of the Time I save”.
you really should have put -30 years at the end instead of 3 seconds
I see a lot of people using the “reckless driving” tech, but if you do the math the time saved doesn’t add up to a lot and you can put yourself into a resource pinch later on, assuming you don’t just wipe your run on a random encounter.
Corner cutting is actually dangeeous move. If you cant pull it of you will get +45 years to your speedrunning timer
He’s already behind the top runners who died at birth.
Speedrunning seggs?
If you skip sleeping, that’s about an 8hour time save you can implement every day. Driving to work is probably 1hr a day minimum. You don’t need to cook every day when you’re saving on gas and rent. So you can raw eggs on Uber eats..
I saved you about 9 hours a day.
I actually did the sleeping clothes technique when I was in highschool.
Nice, i am going now to read this on webtoon
Have you tried glitching through any walls?
Finally!!! It’s been a while. Fantastic work as always!
The cherry on top is when you dive into your bed at 22:59 and your friend is standing by and smacks you very hard in the head with a big wet ham so that you go straight into REM.
-3 seconds to living
thanks, im gonna start calling my reckless driving speed-running strategies
7 minute abs
It’s possible to any% life very quickly but I think it’s a bad idea.
If you think corner cutting is great, just wait till you try clipping through buildings.
I feel like the cooking skip is unnecessary and risky. You risk getting the food poisoning debuff and a -2 morale. Not eating at all would be faster and only applies a small hunger debuff that can be negated in the unskippable “lunch break” cutscene
[Makes me think of this gem. ](https://youtube.com/watch?v=Yefaz8kvs94&si=EnSIkaIECMiOmarE)
I only do this at work. I’m very good at my job lol. But when I’m home? Takes me an hour to clean the kitchen.
If I’m late to work some mornings, I’ll go to my garage, crouch, and walk backwards into the corner facing the approximate direction of travel. When I then jump and turn, I clip through the wall and go soaring. I hot swap my work bag for my umbrella when I hit the apex of the arc, and then float for a couple minutes as the trees start rendering. Usually cuts off about a minute.
Welcome to corporate america.
If you want to really optimize, look into polyphasic sleep https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biphasic_and_polyphasic_sleep
Or don’t and live a happier life.
FYI people do the raw egg thing all the time! It just creeps a lot of people the f out.
Off camera he learns that the 7 minutes he saves by not cooking dinner doesn’t weigh up to the hours upon hours spent on the toilet due to salmonella poisoning.
He’s speedrunning life alright.
No amount of money ever bought a second of time…
ADHD be like
Where’s the punchline?
Not pictured:
* Speedrunning Romance via Ladies of Negotiable Affection.
* Speedrunning childrearing by adopting teenagers.
Important difference is not being able to die over and over
That last panel looks more like an intentional death.