I promise if I ever start a recipe blog I’m gonna start the stories with stuff like “So I was takin a shit and it made we want to try this new kind of coffee I heard about” or “I met a sex furniture maker today and he reminded me of my great aunt Susan and her pierogi recipe.”
You guys would love my **Pan-Seared Tuna Steaks With Miso And Ginger Sauce**. It only takes 4.5 seconds to make!
Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people’s hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can…
“I was conceived in a Chrysler in 1983 after a showing of Return of the Jedi. The next 9 months were a harrowing tale, of which I’d like to review in great detail”
… President Bush boarded a secret NASA flight into outer space, seeking universal clarity on how to handle the attacks. During the trip, an solar vortex hit the ship, annihilating everyone on board. The White House covered this up by digging up the extraterrestrial alien corpse beneath Bush’s home. The government began a satanic ritual reviving the alien with the face and shape of the President’s remains. Cheney took over as the decision-maker while Bush remained the face of the government….
*… And these Maple Shortbread bars are a favorite of the Alien President!*
I never read the stories but I think it’s good that people want to express themselves.
The quantity is the real story. Like why?
The story might be out of hand, but that last name is out of the park. Schrambling, the name of champions.
I’m pretty sure they’re paid by the word, every recipe comes with a complete, detailed and full life story
Hey man, hearing about the gay furry orgy that inspired the salsa dip is essential.
I promise if I ever start a recipe blog I’m gonna start the stories with stuff like “So I was takin a shit and it made we want to try this new kind of coffee I heard about” or “I met a sex furniture maker today and he reminded me of my great aunt Susan and her pierogi recipe.”
You guys would love my **Pan-Seared Tuna Steaks With Miso And Ginger Sauce**. It only takes 4.5 seconds to make!
Call me Ishmael. Some years ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world. It is a way I have of driving off the spleen and regulating the circulation. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the mouth; whenever it is a damp, drizzly November in my soul; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before coffin warehouses, and bringing up the rear of every funeral I meet; and especially whenever my hypos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately stepping into the street, and methodically knocking people’s hats off—then, I account it high time to get to sea as soon as I can…
*who the bloody hell posts this kind of thing without a link to the recipe?!?*
https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1017089-maple-shortbread-bars
Also this can be made from two ingredients. One of which is self-rising flour……
Never forget.
Can we just stop with the fuckin recipe stories? I don’t give 2 fucks about your grand epiphany, I just want some god damned arroz con pollo. Jeez.
Calm the maple-shortbread-fuck down, Regina…
“I was conceived in a Chrysler in 1983 after a showing of Return of the Jedi. The next 9 months were a harrowing tale, of which I’d like to review in great detail”
December 7, 1941. A day that will live in infamy.
29,000 less infamous days later, you can bake this perfect treat for the family this Thanksgiving!
That better read:
>Shortly after the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, I was making maple shortbread bars, and the recipe requires [insert recipe here].
… President Bush boarded a secret NASA flight into outer space, seeking universal clarity on how to handle the attacks. During the trip, an solar vortex hit the ship, annihilating everyone on board. The White House covered this up by digging up the extraterrestrial alien corpse beneath Bush’s home. The government began a satanic ritual reviving the alien with the face and shape of the President’s remains. Cheney took over as the decision-maker while Bush remained the face of the government….
*… And these Maple Shortbread bars are a favorite of the Alien President!*
Ugh…. WHY does one need to read a life story for a simple recipe? This trend must die
r/jschlattsubmissions
Who the fuck starts a recipe like that, I just sat down!
Elon will fire you if you have less than 10,000 words before your recipe.
Why are there pecans in this?
Well, I don’t want to blame it on 9/11, but it certainly didn’t help.
Just scroll down u entitled shit.
People are sharing their recipe and if its unique or diff from the norm at least, I say let them say a story.
Cooking is a passion and if it connects to life via memory and/or emotion, it’s euphoric.
This is the funniest comments section I’ve ever seen on here
Ok but I want that recipe
OHHHHH I hate that about recipes. Just get to the good s***
*WHY THE FUCK IS THE YIELD 39? WHY CANT IT BE FUCKING 40 LIKE A NORMAL RECIPE?*
Why does there even need to be a story with it? Just give me the recipe.
“These lemon bars are light and zesty”
(Festive picture)
“In nazi Germany…”