Sunday, March 17All That Matters

What would you do if you had to spend $30 million in 30 days and be left with ZERO assets to inherit $300 million? And what if you couldn’t tell anyone? That’s what Richard Pryor had to do in Brewster’s Millions.


What would you do if you had to spend $30 million in 30 days and be left with ZERO assets to inherit $300 million? And what if you couldn’t tell anyone? That’s what Richard Pryor had to do in Brewster’s Millions.




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46 Comments

  • RelleMeetsWorld

    For anyone saying “I’ll gamble it all!” or “I’d invest it in the market!”, they had a strict limitation on what portion could be gambled and donated, and you had to be left with exactly NOTHING at the end of the 30 days. Even trash stocks have some value.

    Brewster’s solution was politics. He ran a campaign of “none of the above” because the two guys running for mayor were corrupt scumbags (so unrealistic, right?)

    So, that’s what I’d do. Easy way to lose all your money and see nothing for it.

  • DRHORRIBLEHIMSELF

    I’d buy a ton of extremely rare MTG and Pokemon cards then play people at tourneys for keeps – I don’t know how to play MTG and Pokemon, let alone build a deck.

  • AzLibDem

    Call up the major networks, and tell them I want to watch TV commercial free for a month, and I’ll reimburse them and their advertisers.

    Might take a week.

  • ETosser

    “Jake, I’d like to hire you as my official photographer. Salary: ~~ten thousand dollars a week~~ **30 million dollars a minute**”.

    Short movie.

  • silentmattcanuck

    Watched Brewster’s Millions at the Drive-in.
    It was a double feature. The second movie?
    Back to the Future.

    Grab my cane, I’ll see myself out now.

  • perkail

    I’d buy a yacht, not insure it and then sail it offshore and scuttle it… then I’d spend the next 29 days planning my next ship

  • ajjy21

    Throw a very lavish music festival or series of festivals in exotic locations and require attendees to donate a reasonable ticket cost instead of purchasing tickets. I would of course only travel on a private jet and only stay in the nicest hotels, rent crazy cars, etc. I’d pay top dollar to hire the best event promoters, so I wouldn’t have to do any work, but I’d participate actively in the creative direction of the festival(s). Would be easy to blow $30M.

  • simulacrum81

    Just buy really expensive services that don’t leave you with a tangible asset. You can blow millions on pointless legal advice alone, if you instruct counsel to publish it online, you’re not left with an asset.

  • nworb200

    I would just keep the $30 million. There is a huge chance the benifactor would either cancel the deal or back out on some obscure interpretation.

  • SuperSaiyanBen

    Uhhh I’d just keep the $30 Million and move on with my life?

    Edit- in Light of New Rules I’ve decided I’d take my entire family (14) on an Extravagant 30 day vacation in which we travel the world and only stay at the most expensive hotels, whenever we went to dinner I’d pay to rent out the entire restaurant and we’d only order shit like gold covered caviar and Kobe Lobster. We’d travel in the highest quality stretch limousines. I’d pay to rent out Theme Parks, Aquariums, museums, etc etc. so only my guests were allowed for the day. And while I’m not exactly sure how the itemized bills would look I’m confident after 30-days I’d have spent enough to where I could donate the remaining and be good.

    Also if it counts as a donation or not I’d pay off the debt for all my family members.

    Even if I failed, at the end of the 30-days I’d have purchased nothing they could take back and at the very least would have spent the greatest 30-days someone “like us” could have had.

  • max1mise

    We had a discussion in a writers room once where we talked about old movies that would need to be changed a lot for a remake and Brewster’s Millions came up because unless the number was crazy high its too easy to legitimately burn through money quickly. We thought one of the rules should be where you couldn’t use computers. So no mass auction buys or ticketek batch buying for every event everywhere for the next week. You must deal in person and must benefit directly from the expenditure. No computers is important because these days you can burn through money by just telling a penny stocks A.I. to lose money. Like reversing a logical short etc. Or just keep trading through bad currency exchanges at a loss until the account is zero’d. Even with those rules… still fairly easy to burn through a 30 billion in 30 days. 30 Million is an hour tops.

  • Zeeman9991

    This was one of my favorites as a kid. I really have to rewatch it to see if it holds up, but at the time I thought it was a ton of fun.

  • StePow

    Brewster may not own any assets that are not already his at the end of the 30 days;
    he must get value for the services of anyone he hires;
    he may donate 5% to charity and lose 5% by gambling;
    he may not waste the money by purchasing and destroying valuable objects; and
    he is not allowed to tell anyone!

    Looking at these caveats one of the simplest methods would be to purchase expensive flights, missing the flight wouldn’t breach any of the terms so he could easily book multiple flights across multiple airlines across the globe.

  • dynamic_caste

    I don’t recall the finer points of the terms, but couldn’t you simply rent a lot of stuff to burn through the money? If you live in America, being hospitalized for most of a month will probably take out $30M.

  • Graoutchmeuh

    $30M? Easy.

    I have constant headaches so I would just fly first class to the USA, go to any random hospital.
    A few thousands for the plane tickets and the rest for 3 days of ibuprofen. Done.

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